THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS FAIRNESS

Recently, my grandson, Archer (age 5) asked his mom if other children were blessed with parents who loved them as much as his mom and dad loved him.. and she answered... "no." Many, many children are blessed with loving and attentive parents. They're tucked in at night and they are heard during the day. They have boundaries, but their boundaries are part of the love they have come to trust. There are also many children who receive all the love they need from single parents and parents who have adopted them... BUT there are countless numbers of children... who hear more sobs than laughter... and who live with deep needs and an haunting emptiness... day after day after day. "No, Archer," she said, "There are all sorts of children who do NOT receive as much love and comfort as you receive"... and Archer broke down and cried! That's not fair, he said. it's not fair!

To which I can only say, "Amen. Nothing in life is fair, Archer. Nothing at all." Some kids are born into families... who want for nothing, and other kids are born into families...who have nothing. Some people are pretty, and other people are not. Some kids are affirmed and encouraged, and others are criticized and broken. Some kids are born in America, but some are born in Somalia. Some kids follow a family tradition of attending an Ivy League school, while other kids follow a family tradition of going to prison. Most kids grow up to be healthy men or women... but more than a few...die in tragic accidents... and from rare diseases... and fairness has nothing to do with it! In fact, thinking that things ought to be "fair" is one of the primary causes of discontent in our society.

As an ordained minister, I've read the Bible several times... and I've never seen the word "fair" (as we use it) a single time. I've encountered "love," "grace," "justice," "mercy," "forgiveness," "surrender," "righteousness," "peace," "contentment," "courage," even "punishment,"... but I've never encountered "fairness," as a theological theme. Like Job, we complain when things don't seem "fair," and like the prophets of old, we wonder why the "good die young"...which is why we need courage, perseverance,
and God's amazing grace. Archer, there's nothing "fair" under the sun. Give up on it. Instead, be content with what you have. Rejoice in the grace you've received. Be grateful for the love you've been blessed to give and receive... and give as much love to others... as God has given to you! Don't worry about fairness, Archer, because it doesn't exist. But never quit opening doors for others and lifting them up. This, itself, is not fair, but it sure is loving and just. Amen.