SHOTGUNS, BOWLING BALLS, & CHRISTMAS EXPECTATIONS

When I was a kid, Christmas was a mixed blessing. We didn't believe in much, and we didn't even stay home. Usually, we drove out to the Grundon's for Christmas Eve, which was okay (if not overdone)... but Jack Daniels always joined us. Alcohol filled our Christmases with tension...but still, I harbored my wishes and expectations. Yes, I had my expectations... and I had a script in my head of what people needed to do and say... and what gifts I needed to receive... to make my Christmas "good."  I had definite expectations of what would make Christmas "good," but I was disappointed more than once. My greatest disappointment came on the Christmas when I wanted a bowling ball with all my heart. I really, really wanted a bowling ball of my own- one drilled just for me, with my name on it... but my father decided to get me and my two brothers new shotguns. He liked to hunt and my brothers liked it as well... but I kept telling mom to get Larry and Randy a shotgun for Christmas... but to get me a bowling ball instead. Well, come Christmas morning... I had  shotgun... and very little faith in either Jesus or Santa.

I was brokenhearted because Christmas didn't meet my expectations! It was a terrible Christmas because I didn't get what I expected. It was an awful Christmas because it didn't meet my expectations, and if truth be known, I still get disappointed when things don't meet my expectations. Whether it's a project at work, the outcome of a game, or the way in which a relationship unfolds- things seem wrong when they don't meet my expectations. A lot of people are like me. Things are good when they meet their expectations, and they need to be fixed when they don't. It's that simple. Many people evaluate things through the lens of their expectations, and when they don't match up, they are upset... disappointed... sometimes to the point of looking for something... or someone... else. Embracing a role model, a spouse, even a savior, AS THEY ARE can be very difficult... because our expectations get in the way!

This may have been John the Baptist's problem when he asked Jesus if he was the Anointed One or if he (John) should look for someone else. Scholars have made other guesses, but I suspect that John's own expectations blinded him to Jesus' identity.  Otherwise, John's question makes no sense at all,,, because according to Scripture, John had baptized Jesus and pointed him out as "The Lamb of God." Putting aside the fact that John and Jesus were related, the Bible makes it clear that John told Jesus that he wasn't even worthy to untie Jesus' sandals. Friends, there's no doubt that John thought Jesus was the Messiah...at one time... back when he thought Jesus would meet his expectations ... before he was thrown into Herod's dungeon... before time began to drag... with no changes, not even any tough talk. John was a man of action,,, and perhaps... he began to think...maybe- just maybe- Jesus was not the man. Jesus was not living up to John's expectations of what a Messiah should do and say, and John was beginning to wonder... if Jesus was the one.

Many Christians have a similar battle with their expectations when they start their faith journeys. They're excited about Jesus in the beginning. They buy a Bible, even two. They study, join things, and attend worship services... religiously... but then the pastor says something they don't agree with, or the youth group isn't led in the way that they would lead it, or the wrong songs are sung... and they're gone... disappointed because the church did not meet their expectations. Or take a couple who've been been active in church for a long time. They seem to have mature faith. They're involved in everything and they talk all of the talk... until their marriage crumbles... or a child dies... and then they lose their faith altogether... because God did not met their expectations. If they were God, they figure, they would not have let bad things happen to good people like themselves...so a God who stands with them in the midst of their loss... isn't worth the time of day. Their own expectations separate them from God at the very time when they needed Him most.

It's easy to get so caught up in what we think should be happening... that we fail to see what's actually happening. So, John sent his disciples to Jesus with a direct question: are you the One? Are you the one? Isn't this a powerful question? Didn't Jesus ask his disciples- who do you say that I am? And isn't Jesus asking you and me this question now: Am I the One you have been waiting for? This is a life-changing question, and Jesus simply invited John to open his eyes. Tell John, he responded, to quit looking for what he wants to see... and to start seeing what God is doing! People who haven't seen for years...nothing or dimly... no light, maybe shadows... are seeing clearly; people who've never heard good news.... can hear me whisper, I love you, and I would die for you; people who are poor (in all the ways people are poor) are richer than rich; people who haven't been touched in years... are being greeted and hugged; and those who've been given up for dead... are being reborn! I feel confident that He didn't need to say anything more- not to John- because the Baptist knew his Bible. He knew that these very things- new life, vision, love, hope- are signs of the Kingdom.  We know it too... but sometimes... we get so caught up in ourselves- in our own expectations and needs- that we just don't see clearly.

Friends, I can't make Christmas "good." My father couldn't make it good, and neither can you. It IS good. Moreover, we can't manage Christmas. We can decorate our homes, turn Christmas music on, and set snacks on every table, but Christmas comes to us as a gift of grace. Of course, we want to be good hosts and generous givers, and all good Presbyterians will make their homes orderly... but Christmas isn't about us- it's about Jesus. He's the giver of new names, forgiveness and salvation... and these gifts have nothing whatsoever to do with shotguns and bowling balls.

My dad's been dead for more than 35 years now... but if I could do it all over again, I'd get my expectations out of the way... and say, "Thanks dad! This is a beautiful gun. Do you have the time to take us out shooting this weekend?" Amen.