When I was in the business world, I worked with a company who had copyrighted an affirmation program that they called "Drops for Your Bucket," and they were kind enough to give us permission to use it. So, we did. We drew drops on paper, and we made them big and small. We ran copies on all sorts of different colors, and we encouraged our employees to use them, which they did in large numbers. They developed the art of looking for positive qualities, and actually responding in specific ways. Instead of focusing on the negative and, worse yet, gossiping, we made it possible for people to share affirming words with each other. For instance, if I were to hand out drops of affirmation this morning, I would give one to each of you who labor behind the scenes to fold, prepare, and deliver our church newsletter. Month after month, you come through for us, and we know it, I would also give a drop to Pam Hughes, who looks after our little ones in the nursery, week after week, and we don't pay her what we should. I would give drops to all of you who are dependable because dependability is an under-rated quality, and I'd give drops to those of you who are watering our flowers and plants in this very dry summer. We know who you are, and we should've taken the time to thank you. I'd give a drop to those who are going out of their way to help others get to our church events, and I would give a drop to Vic and Diane Hennessey because their ministry of visitation and helping... lifts my spirit. Of course, there are many more drops that could be given, and drops aren't meant for public consumption anyway. They aren't awards, just affirming notes. They build esteem and they tap into the power of affirming words, They certainly were a big hit for us "back in the day," and I can attest to the fact that I saw grown men and women line their offices- both in our stores and in our corporate offices- with drops that they had received.
A writer named Sam Crabtree has written 100 specific ways in which we can affirm one another and I posted a link to his list on Facebook. To cite just a few, Crabtree notes that we can...
1) Commend the usefulness of an idea that solves a problem. Break away from the agenda for a
moment and say, "That was an excellent suggestion. Thanks;"
2) Let someone know that you admire a quality of theirs. "You know, Morgan, I haven't said it
before, but I really love your music. Thanks,"
3) Find someone whom you are thankful for, and tell them that you are. "I just want you to know
that it makes me feel good to see you each Sunday, or to have you on our team;"
4) Tell someone that you are praying for him or her, and that God has placed them in your heart;
5) Ask someone's advice and act on it.
There are 95 more and dozens that you can add yourselves, but you have the idea. Develop the art of affirming the good in others. Be sincere, be specific, be faithful in your ministry of affirmation. Do this religiously, if you will, and you will be in good company because, even as God affirmed his Son, the apostle Paul often tapped into the power of affirmation. Indeed, his short letter to Philemon is a great example of this. In fact, the one chapter book of Philemon... is something of a "drop" for Philemon's bucket, even as it is also a letter of affirmation for Onesimus, whom Paul is sending back to Philemon. Onesimus had been Philemon's slave, and he had ran away for reasons that are not disclosed. In any event, Onesimus found a home with Paul, and his ministry to Paul (in prison) touched Paul's heart greatly. So, Paul wrote Philemon a "drop," letting Philemon know that his own Christ-like love was deep enough to receive Onesimus back... as a full partner in ministry. This Biblical book entitled "Philemon," could be entitled, "Onesimus," or perhaps simply, "The Power of Affirming Words." Listen, as I recap Paul's note in my own words...
Dear Philemon, our friend and fellow worker, I want you to know that your love for Christ is noteworthy. I hear about it all the time, and I thank God for it in my own prayers. Philemon, your love gives me joy, It refreshes my heart, and your love gives me the boldness to send your servant, Onesimus, back to you, knowing that you will welcome him... as if he were me. You know, Philemon, I can't tell you how much Onesimus means to me. He came to me while I was in prison, and he has blessed me with service and ministry, just as you would've if you had been here. If he owes you anything, bill me for it, and embrace him as a brother in Christ. I know that you have more than enough faith to treat Onesimus as a brother, so I will close with these words- get the spare bedroom ready, I'll be coming soon. In Christ, Paul.
Friends, affirming words can open doors and change lives. They can set a man or a woman free, and they honor Christ, in whom there is neither slave nor free. Affirming words are not manipulative words. The last thing we need is more self-serving flattery. One of our central principles is to... "speak the truth in love" ... where each word counts... and I think this is still our wisest course. But... we don't have to stray from the truth to be a minister of affirmation! No, not at all. On the contrary, all we need to do is to open our eyes to the Christ that abides in one another, and love one another as He commanded. Loving one another means a number of things, but surely it includes building one another up with affirming words. If you have the gift of music, join our choir. If you have a heart for children, sign up for tutoring or our Drop-In Center. If you have an eye for beauty, adopt a section of our property. And if you have the gift of affirmation, share it... because there should never be an unsung servant in our midst!
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