GRACE AND NOTHING ELSE AT ALL

      A friend once told me that her pastor preached "responsible grace," and while I think I know what she had in mind, grace cannot be burdened with any adjective. Grace is simply grace, unearned, undeserved, unfair, and hard to understand. It must be unmerited and unconditional to be grace at all. I've known people- perhaps you have too- who seem to believe that grace ought to be given to those who are "trying hard," or who will "appreciate it," or who "won't need it again." But this cannot be grace because grace cannot keep score. Grace is unfettered and undeserved loving kindness. It forgives those who will "straighten out their ways"... and those who won't. It lifts up those who will "pass it forward"... and those who won't. It blesses those who are very, very good... and those who aren't even trying to be good! Grace seems unfair to us and most people feel as if they don't "deserve" it. They don't... deserve it... but it is the only hope we have                                                                                                                                         

When God "speaks" to us. it is grace; when God listens to us, it is also grace;                                                                                     When God clothed Adam and Eve even though they had sinned, it was grace;                                                                                     When Jesus invited himself to have lunch with Zacchaeus, it was grace;                                                                                             When a Rainbow appears in the sky, when a wound heals, when hope rises, it is all grace;                                                            
When people stick with us in tough times and don't run away;    When they continue to love us and don't give up on us, it is grace;
When God blessed Sarai with a baby boy named "laughter" Isaac, it was grace;                                                                                     When Jesus hung on his cross and welcomed the thief hanging next to him into his kingdom, it was grace!                                          When the Son of God ended his work by saying, "Father, forgive them," it was amazing grace!

 "Rain is grace," Updike said. "Grace is love that stoops and rescues," according to John Scott. "Listen to you life," Buechner says, "touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it (because) life itself is grace." In Rumi's view, "grace comes to forgive and then forgive again." When Jesus talked about forgiving 70 times 7, completely and as a way of life, he was talking about grace. Creation is about grace. Salvation is about grace. Kindness is about grace. Heaven is about grace. Dying with a loved one at your side is grace. Forgiving and loving yourself is grace! It's all about unmerited, unearned. undeserved favor and that is grace! May we dry our tears, leap for joy, and get out there and shower others with grace in Christ's name and for God's sake! Amen.
     

REFLECTING ON OUR LITTLE CHURCH FAMILY

Jimmy rolls along... embracing his faith and traditional values,
      In his mind, they fit together perfectly,
            and he watches Fox for legitimate news.
Susie's mind is filled with observations and answers.
      She knows a lot about a lot of things,
            but tolerance is not her strong suit.
Bob has trouble breathing.
      He's a gracious man,
            and we're all glad that he has someone to love him.
Marjorie's gone now, like so many others,
      but she had enough time on this earth
            to read the entire Bible... 33 times!
Ralph is battling Alzheimer's-
      so is Joe, and Mary, and several others.
           It's a cruel thing that seems epidemic.
Vern's hanging on, clinging to his home,
      fighting for his independence, and
           always missing his wife.
Katie's found a new love.
      I hope he treats her like a princess.
            We don't know of anyone more deserving.
George & Lettie, Doug & Debra- they're grieving their daughters.
      They always will, and we need to do
            a better job of remembering their sacred days.
Where have all the children gone?
      They were all just kids when I arrived.
            May God be with them in their vulnerable years.
Judy has significant struggles physically,
      but her spirit is strong,
            and she's a wonderful joy-giver.
No one seems to know why Frieda has so little energy.
      Her doctors don't know why
            and I wonder if they ever will.
Jack and Joyce are gathering grandkids,
      and riding our highways on their Golden Wings.
            But fall's coming, and we'll see more of them in church.
John continues to fight cancer,
      and now, I've learned that Morgan's dad is too.
            Where is the cure that they've promised?
Last year, Harper spent her birthday in Iowa City.
      This year, she's at home- active and beautiful-
            and we can't help but shout "God is good"
We'll be baptizing little Jack and an adult next week.
      Jack is between 2 and 3- the adult is much older-
            but I love baptisms- adult, babies, and everyone in between.
Our little flock has almost no interest
      in adding to their numbers...
            but their commitment to community is unmatched.
So, they come and go,
      loving one another as family,
            doing the same old things in the same old way.
Truth is- in our church family...
      some members are thriving, some are dying;
      some are alone, and some can't find time to be alone;
      some are building houses, some are leaving homes;
      some are active, some we seldom see;
Our little church family... is experiencing life together.
      We work together, pray together, and walk together.
            talking, planning, laughing, crying, struggling
                  to be the church Christ wants them to be.
Pray for us
      as we make our way
            in a world filled with mega-churches.
Pray that our love for one another
      will be a beacon and that we'll never
            put church ahead of Christ!
       
   

IN TRIBUTE TO MY LITTLE BROTHER

      Today I have my little brother, Randy, on my mind... and in my heart. He died of AIDS in September, 1994, and those of us who loved him will never forget him. He was bright, witty, and engaging. He was talented and competitive, but innocent and vulnerable at the same time. He died not long before they developed the "cocktail" that would've saved his life. He died before his boys grew into the men they are today... and he died without knowing the full joy of being a grandfather. If he had lived- if they would've had a cure- if he had been more cautious-there's no telling where his career would've gone. If he would've lived, I am sure that he would've won a thousand more board games... and shared thousands of more laughs. He would've also shared our grief when Larry died; and he would've both given and received more than his share of love. He would've brightened our days if he had lived...but he didn't... because he died of AIDS... in Anniston, Alabama ... way back in 1994. Twenty five years have come and gone, and it is time to write him a brief love note.
      Dear Randy, it has been 25 years since I've seen your face... but I will never forget it!  I remember how you would run into my bedroom when the storms inside and outside of our home frightened you, and I remember how small you were when you were a kid. I remember the time when mom and dad left you in a gas station in South Dakota... and Larry and I didn't bother to tell them (although they noticed you were missing 30 miles or so down the road)! I remember how proud you were of the store that you and Larry owned together, and I remember how close you were to Larry and his family. I remember the taco eating contests that you won, and all of us will always remember our vacation trip to the Grand Canyon. I remember the day when you nearly beat me in our marathon tennis match... and I will never forget how routinely you beat me at everything else. I will never forget how you compensated for the big slice you had off of the tee, and I will remember the day when you agreed to put your life back together... like it was yesterday. With delight, I recall the way that you and Linda played cribbage and all sort of games...and I remember the beautiful home that you and John had when you died. I remember the day when you and Larry and I went to the driving range in Plano. I will never forget how faithful your sons were when you were suffering... and I remember how Aaron and I played tennis to get your impending death off of our minds. With gratitude, I remember the wonderful care that hospice gave you... and I will never forget the "bulb garden" that you bought for Sherry and me. As you planned, it arrived after your death... and I'm sorry that I planted several of the bulbs upside down. 
      I remember when you told me that you were not afraid to die... and I remember the faith you expressed as we walked around our sanctuary in Joliet. When Larry was dying, I asked him if he thought he would see you in heaven, and he said that, while he didn't know about "seeing you," he did think that he would recognize you. I pray this is true, and I want you to know, Randy, that my life has not been as full since you've been gone. I write this blog, and I opine on any number of topics. They are all very real to me. The joys and the sorrows of life- I've come to embrace them both- and I want you to know that losing Larry created a deep void in my life. He was my best friend and I was always so very proud of him... but I am sure that he would agree- you were our little brother! You were "the R," and we loved you with all of our hearts. Those of us who were left behind... still do.  Ken, 

WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH LAZARUS?

      There was a certain rich man who wore purple linen clothes everyday- not just for special occasions, but everyday. Purple was a sign of wealth and this man, who later became known as “Dives,” wore it every single day. He lived like a king and dined on the best of food. In a time when people struggled to afford meat, this rich man ate pheasant, dormice, boar, and lamb on a regular basis, along with the best fruit and wine that money could buy.  There was a certain poor man (who was every bit as poor as the rich man was rich) named Lazarus who laid near the rich man’s gate. Instead of purple clothes, Lazarus was covered in sores, that dogs licked as they roamed the streets, and he longed for nothing more than a few crumbs from the rich man’s table. But they never came. Not a scrap, not a drink… because Dives didn’t seem to see him. Day after day, the rich man would come and go without acknowledging the poor man who laid at his gate in any way. In the course of time, both men died. Lazarus was taken by angels and placed in the bosom of Father Abraham. Dives, on the other hand, ended up in hell, where he experienced great emotional and physical agony. According to Jesus’ parable, the rich man was suffering when he lifted his eyes and saw both Abraham and Lazarus. Have mercy on me, he cried out to Abraham, and send Lazarus to give me a drop of water to quench my thirst. Abraham said, ‘My son, do not forget that when you were living you had your good things. Lazarus had bad things.” And more than all this, no one from here can get to you! (see Luke 16:19ff)

      A certain rich man’s land produced a bountiful crop. Its abundance caught him by surprise and he wondered what he should do with his abundance. Then he thought, here’s what I’ll do. I’ll tear down my barns and build bigger ones. Then I will be on easy street for the rest of my life. I will rest, eat, drink, and throw parties without a care in the world. But God said to him, “You fool,” you should’ve stored up your riches in heaven because this is your last day on earth. (see Luke 12:13ff) There was a man who came to Jesus and said, "Teacher, what can I do to gain eternal life?" Obey the commandments, Jesus stated. I have, the man replied. “Then,” Jesus said, “sell what you own, give the proceeds to the poor, and follow me.” When the young man heard this, he went away sad because he was very rich. (Matt. 19:16ff) In his 1^st letter to Timothy, Paul told him to tell those who have riches "to do a lot of good things, to be generous, and by doing this, they will store up a treasure for themselves which is a good foundation for the future." (1 Tim. 6:16-19)

      And so what are we to make of all of this, especially those of us who are rich by the world’s standards? There is no reason to think that Dives insulted or abused Lazarus… but he was blind to Lazarus’ needs. He didn’t see him. There’s no reason to think that the rich "fool" should have felt guilty because he received a bountiful crop, or that he should not have carefully considered what to do with it….but it’s clear that he didn’t see his connection with those in need, and didn’t see that the future is God’s time! Likewise, it doesn’t seem that the rich ruler was corrupt or evil, but it is clear that he just couldn’t bring himself to let go of his riches because he had fallen in love with them.

      To me, these passages are personal. They are not indictments against riches as such- Abraham, for instance, was extremely rich. They warn us about misusing riches, but they do not condemn them or celebrate poverty. They are not about economic systems or a redistribution of wealth, but they do ask two very important questions to me: 1) are you doing a lot of good things and being generous with what you have, and 2) what are you doing with Lazarus? I am challenged to wear my riches well and share generously as God leads me. But here’s the question that haunts me: what are you doing with Lazarus? What am I doing with Jesus when he appears to me as a beggar on the street, as an unwelcome intruder cleaning my windshield, as a lonely figure in an alley, as a young woman whose life has gone all wrong, as someone I know who is simply hard to like, as someone who is responsible for their own hard times (in my view), as a chronic complainer who can’t or won’t help themselves, or a Lazarus, who is dying under my watch?

      To me, Christianity is little more that this: what am I doing with the gifts God has given to me and how am I treating His Son when I see him in need? Do I even see him? Do I see that I am connected to him? Am I willing to go out of my way to be of assistance? Do I trust in grace even when I doubt the person whom I see in need? I would like to think that I would’ve paid for Lazarus’ medical care, fed him lavishly, and given him a place to call home… or at least looked him in the eye and given him a few crumbs from my table, but based on my track record, I seek forgiveness instead. O Lord, give me eyes that see you when you appear to me, a heart that breaks with yours, and enough courage to get involved. Amen!

 

MY LAST BEER (and an Angel)

      Today I want to talk about the pain of being lost and the joy of being found, from the perspective of  experience and the truth of Scripture. It was just about this time of year in 1976. I was living with a friend because Sherry had finally grown weary of my antics. My friend went to watch the Cornhuskers and I went out for a pizza and a beer. Nothing unusual about any of that, but suddenly a wave of emptiness came over me, deeper than anything I had ever felt, and my eyes were opened to the fact that I was terribly lost. I felt like a “nothing in a nowhere,” to borrow a phrase from Walter Wangerin. I had been more than a little lost for some time. I didn’t know where I had been (most of the past was blank to me), and I didn’t know where I was going. I didn’t know what I stood for, what I believed in, what I was dreaming of. I could see that I was morally corrupt, spiritually bankrupt, and deeply- perhaps irretrievably- lost! So I set my beer down, paid the bill, and stopped by home on the way to a treatment center- where I assumed I would be in a straight-jacket, and I didn’t even care.

      Have you ever been lost? Have you taken the wrong path, chased after the wrong things, invested in the wrong priorities, lost track of the community you belonged to, drifted away from the only person in the world who really cared about you? Have you ever lost your sense of identity, your sense of being? Have you ever lost your resolve, your anchor, your soul? Have you ever lost your sense of tomorrow and your awareness of now?   

      Have you ever found yourself believing that no one cares whether you are lost or found! I suspect that some of you may have but this is NOT the case… because everyone is someone in God’s eyes. It is God’s nature to save and no one is disposable in God’s view, which brings me to our passage, Luke 15:1-10. Verses 2-7 make it clear that a) 1 is a valuable number, b) God will go to any length to find and save just one of His flock, and 3) heaven stands and applauds when a single lost sheep is found and carried home! The “one” is worth saving, the lost are worth finding, no matter how long they’ve been lost, no matter why they got lost, no matter how badly lost they are! As our shepherd, God will find us when we’re lost and carry us home (period).

      It is God’s nature to search and save and God will spare no effort to find anyone of us who is lost. If you are a woman (vs. 8-10) who has 10 coins and one of them falls to your dirt floor, you will light your lantern, sweep your floor, and sift through the dirt with your bare hands, if necessary, to find your valuable coin. You would leave nothing unturned and, when you found your coin, your would break into a mile-wide smile and throw a party to celebrate the coin that was found. This is the nature of God’s household- sinners who are lost will be found, restored, and celebrated in joy!

      Friends, we get lost! We wander off the road. We chase after shiny objects. We fall in love with lesser gods and we lose ourselves in the process. Or the pressures of life, the struggles we’ve known, the little deaths we’ve died- crush our innocence and our faith at the same time. Our hope disappears. Our sense of purpose and even self slips away Van Gogh notably said, “What preys on my mind is this question: what am I good for? Could I not be of service in some way?” Well, I know the service and the Way. So do you, but I also know the feelings that Van Gogh is giving voicing.    

      After I had been in “treatment” for 2-3 weeks, Pastor Lu came to visit me on 6^th floor west. I was not a church member myself, but he and Sherry had been praying for me for a year or so, praying that God would find me. So, after a brief conversation, Lu asked me if I was tired of being lost. He asked if I wanted to find a peace that I had never known. He asked me if I wanted to accept the Living God as my God and also to realize a greater purpose in serving Him. “Yes, yes, yes,” I said. Then join me, he replied, and we prayed a prayer that went something like this: “Dear God, I’ve learned that the lesser gods of this world will only use me and toss me away. I’ve seen the power of sin and I have reveled in it. I am a lost sinner, Lord, and I can’t make it without you. Be my strength, Lord. Be my hope. I accept and trust in you as my Lord and Savior. And with your help, I will stay the course of faithfulness and nurture the wondrous truth… that you love me and would’ve died for me alone. In Christ’s name, amen!”

      Friends, there are demons in our lostness… but there are angels too. God is searching for you if you are lost, and He will not grow weary in the search. When God finds you, and He surely will, God will carry you home as heaven stands in applause. Amen!