HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

            I want to thank you for giving me the chance to welcome you tonight, and for inviting me to say a few words about love. First, we need to thank Annette and her ministry team for blessing us with such a wonderful event!

            And now, on to love, which is why you’re here. Some of you are celebrating marital love and we applaud that wonderful and God-given institution. No less a man that Socrates said, “(By all means) marry! If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy; if not, you’ll be a philosopher!” Either way you’ll be blessed, but love is bigger than any marriage, so we’ll broaden our perspective and recognize Philia (the love of friend for friend), and Storge (the love that forms between family members, one that you’re born into or one you choose, like a military unit or people who share a kindred cause.) We also recognize agape love- unconditional love that knows no bounds or limits. Agape love is God’s love, but I also see it right here… with men and women who have discovered what it means when they said “for better or worse.” Day after day they give their hearts to someone who may not reciprocate or even recognize them. One of my favorite authors is Frederick Buechner and especially his devotional called, “Listening to Your Life,” in which he writes: “The love for equals is a human thing- of friend for friend, of brother of brother. It is to love what is loving and lovely. The world smiles. The love for the less fortunate is a beautiful thing- the love for those who suffer, for those who are poor, the sick, the failures, the unlovely. This is compassion and it touches the heart of the world. The love for the more fortunate is a rare thing- to love those who succeed where we fail, to rejoice without envy with those who rejoice, the love of the poor for the rich, of the black man for the white man. The world is always bewildered by its saints. And then there is the love for the enemy- the love for the one who does not love you but mocks, threatens, and inflicts pain. The tortured’s love for the torturer. This is God’s love. It conquers the world.”  Remember these words because they are very profound.

            I thought about trying a little stand-up tonight, but Sherry says that you expect a pastor to be… serious and thought. Presbyterian. So I will read from Scripture. “How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful. Your eyes behind you veil are doves. Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from the hills of Gilead. Your teeth are like a flock of sheep just shorn, coming up from the washing. Each has its twin; not one of them is alone. Your lips are like a scarlet ribbon; your mouth is lovely. Your temples behind your veil are like the halves of the pomegranate.  Your neck is like the tower of David built with courses of stone…. Your breasts are like two fawns, like twin fawns of a gazelle, that browse among the lilies. You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you.” Song of Songs 4:1-7. Sensual love… is a gift. So tell your darling that she has hair like goats, and all of her teeth, and that she reminds you of one of Pharoah’s mares (1:9). We celebrate it too if this love is the love you miss most tonight because (in God’s hands) love never dies! But Eros love- no matter how beautiful- is not the half of love- and for many of us, not even the deepest form of love. I mentioned Philia earlier, and the love of friend for friend can be a life-giving thing. “When you’re weary, feeling small; when tears are in your eyes, I dry them all. I’m on your side… when times get rough and friends just can’t be found. Like a bridge over troubled water, I will lay me down. When you’re down and out, when you’re on the street, when evening falls so hard, I will comfort you. I will take your part. When darkness comes and pain is all around, like a bridge over troubled water I will lay me down. Sail on silver girl, sail on by. Your time has come to shine. All your dreams are on their way. See how they shine. If you need a friend, I’m sailing right behind. Like a bridge over troubled water, I will ease your mind!” Surely you remember this Simon and Garfunkel song, and probably agree that it is better than Simon’s song, “Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover.”

            What a wonderful tribute to Philia, and many of you have been blessed with friends who were sailing right behind, or who were your best cheerleaders when you were shining. May God be blessed for the love of friend for friend- a love that the Bible lifts up with David and Jonathan. Someone said that, whereas in eros love one person wants the other…in real love, that same person will want the best for other. In other words, real love is neither controlling or possessive. It lets go, which brings me to my friend, Johnny, who got caught up in the wrong things and died young. He was hit by a car in Chicago, and I entered his life while he was recovering in Joliet. He had issues, but he was sweet, and he had a big heart. He also had a great family who stuck with him, and at his funeral, I was compelled to read the words of Willie Nelson’s song, “Angel Flying Too Close To The Ground,” because it captures the depth of human love and even some of God’s love… with these words: “If you had not fallen, then I would not have found you- angel flying too close to the ground. And I patched up your broken wing and hung around for a while, trying to keep you spirits up… and your fever down. I knew someday that you would fly away, for love’s the greatest healer to be found. So leave me if you need to- I will still remember… angel flying too close to the ground. Fly on. Fly on past the speed of sound. I’d rather see you up than see you down. So leave me if you need to. I will still remember angel flying to close to the ground.”

            I love those words, and I love “love.” I love the promise of love, and I can’t wait to be in our granddaughter’s wedding this summer. I love the love of family, and it gives me joy when I think of Kendra and Brittany, with their little boys and all the love they will experience… as the years unfold. My love for our daughters is limitless, and I cry for those who have lost children. I love the love of country and of things honorable. I love men and women who have given much more than I’ve ever given, and they gave it out of love. I love “old” love, which has grown to be deeper than words can describe. Over time, I’ve been blessed with more love than I’ve deserved. I’ve known eros and it’s not a stranger yet. I’ve known Philia with deep and lasting friendships. I’ve know Storge with a wonderful extended family, and also with church families- where people loved me without strings and allowed me to love them. Their faces come to me from time to time and they fill my heart and soul. I owe my life to God love, and here I mean the atoning love of Christ in the plainest sense of the word, and I owe what little sanity I have… to the woman sitting over there. Even though my love was self-centered and immature early on, she was there in my darkest hours, and traded in a nice house in Omaha that had a full library in oak… for student housing in Chicago, where the baseboard was duct-tape. Happy Valentine’s Day, Sherry. I love you.

            Friends, life runs out here on earth, as if it was sand in an hourglass. Never pass up a chance to tell people you love that you love them, and always be vulnerable enough to let them love you. Cling to others when you’re invited to cling. Let go when you must. Love yourself as a child of God, but don’t let it blind you to a deeper love that others can give… and certainly not from God’s love … which does indeed save the world. Have a great Valentine’s evening!